You know what really grinds my gears...?
Daylight
savings time.
First,
let me say that I never can remember when daylight savings begins and when it
ends. Does it begin in the spring when we set our clocks ahead an hour or does
it begin when we set them back an hour in the fall? (That kids, is a rhetorical
question... I’m writing this on the magical Google-machine that knows the
answer to all of life’s questions.) But I digress...
Whoever
thought the notion of playing with our clocks must have been a raving lunatic
with no children. I remember so vividly being 7 or 8 years old and my bedtime
being 8 p.m. and being forced to go to bed when the sun was still up during
summer vacation.
Now,
as an (emotionally immature) adult, I wake up at 5:48 a.m. every morning. By
the time I get my kid to the bus stop at 6:43 a.m., the sun is up. Sort of. But
it doesn’t matter because by 7 a.m. I’m entering the dungeon of fluorescent
lights that is my place of employment. Once again, even as an adult, the
switching of the clock takes its toll on me. How? Because here it is,
mid-November, and I’m rolling out of my office at 3:45 p.m. and the sun is
beginning to set. By the time I stop at the store and get home, it’s 4:30 p.m.
and I can’t so much as walk my dogs in the neighborhood without needing a
flashlight to find their “land mines”.
I
thought it was a dumb idea back then and I continue to think it’s dumb. Who are
we doing this for? Some say farmers. Do the crops know when we mess with the
clocks? I’m pretty sure we get the same amount of daylight regardless of what
Mickey’s hands say on my watch. As a former “County” boy, I can say with a
level of certitude that farmers work hard and make sure the job is done, paying
little attention to what the digital clocks in their trucks say.
Guess
the “person” that cares most about the changing of the clocks? My Chocolate
Labrador Retriever...Drake. Mr. Drake Gilligan Thivierge (yes, my dog has a
middle name... don’t judge) has an internal clock that can rival the master
atomic clock at the U.S. Naval Observatory in Washington, D.C. And it’s not a
“wake up, I need to go out” internal clock. His internal clock triggers his
salivary glands beginning at 4:30 p.m. every afternoon... knowing full well
that his suppertime is 5 p.m. And when we set the clocks back a couple weekends
ago, his internal clock began to tell his salivary glands that suppertime was
upon him and would start spreading his trail of drool at 3:30 p.m.
My
dog is one of the smartest people I know. He knows that it’s not natural to
play with time like this. Whether it is science or God that made our planet
rotate in this way, it doesn’t matter. What matters is my and/or my dogs
feeding schedule. And as much as I want to move to Texas when my wife allows me
to, I’m thinking Hawaii or Arizona may also be decent choices.... neither of
theses states mess with their clocks.
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